Courageous leaders have learned to govern themselves, to manage their emotional reactivity, to restrain their impulsivity.

Like the impulse for revenge, to employ terrorist tactics, or zero-sum strategies. Courageous leaders will resist the ever-present impulse to resist another’s resistance.

Think about that for a minute.

When you encounter someone resisting you, what you stand for, what you care about, or what you’re invested in what do you do? The most natural thing is for you to resist them back. Right?

I assert you do this all the time.

-Kirk Kirlin, from the book “Leadership Courage,” more at


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