Maybe you’re committed to DO>HAVE>BE. After all, it’s what you know, how you keep life manageable, and the best way you’ve found to get people to accept you.

DO>HAVE>BE provides the opportunity to immerse yourself in constant activity without struggling with the existential question of why you’re alive.

86 father daughterWho are you, apart from all you do?

As daughters and sons in whom God delights, who’ve been rescued from judgement to security in the Father’s love … the answer could be straightforward. For many Christians, apparently it’s not.

I didn’t grow up in a Christian home. Not really. Ours was a productive home. I learned early that my value lay in productivity. DO good, DO helpful things, DO what’s right…and you’ll be valuable, virtuous, loved. Subtly and overtly, the message was reinforced a hundred ways.

86 drumsI loved the drums. But, playing drums isn’t productive. Schoolwork is productive. “Get off the drums and do your homework.” “Your homework’s done? Then read ahead. Do more.”

 

I came to understand myself as a ‘productivity machine’ and to people as ‘a means to get things done’.

 

So, like my siblings, I was a bit of an achiever. 86 productiveAt Harvard, I surrendered my strife-filled life to Christ, experienced surprising peace, joy, and love. To be unconditionally loved was rewarding and refreshing. Completely new.

Soon, though, I landed in a fundamentalist charismatic church. Suffocating legalism grew gradually. I compiled an ever-growing mountain of behavioral do’s and don’t.  Desiring to please God who’d so graciously rescued me, I mustered the self-discipline honed in childhood, tucked in my chin, and ran toward the “high calling of God in Christ”.  DO>HAVE>BE.

Along the path were achievements, accolades, esteem, and recognition.

I morphed into a ‘ministry machine’.
What about you?

And, as years passed isolation grew. So did insecurity, discouragement, exhaustion, fear.

86 busyDO>HAVE>BE is exhausting. 

Have you noticed?

After several excruciating setbacks—I consider them God’s severe mercy—I came to the end of my striving…again.

I’d been introduced to BE>DO>HAVE.

Unsettling initially, it provided a framework for seeing God’s Word—and myself—differently. It anchored my primary identity as God’s beloved child. A few workshops helped clarify my uniqueness. Recalling experiences of God’s particular pleasure (remember Eric Liddell?) I discovered specific ways of being that blossom to life. In these times, people experienced clarity, courage, and confidence to be who God had distinctively called them to.

A securely loved child of God, I get to champion leaders to live God’s special calling, all-in. 

Leaders like you.

Not what we do, but who we are.

 

 

Coaching Distinctions #86.doc