85 to beWe’re contrasting two fundamental paradigms that inform most everyone’s approach to life. In American society DO>HAVE>BE is the prevalent worldview.

In thousands of messages we’re told: “you’ve gotta do a, b, and c in order to have x, y, and z so that you can be: smart, important, respected, beautiful, famous, admired, significant, wealthy, important, successful…somebody”.

Yet, Christ modeled a completely different way of living. “I AM the Father’s Son, so I DO what I see my father doing, and I HAVE the glory intended for me.” [Jn 5:19-23]

Of us, he says: “We ARE his handiwork, we DO the good God intended for us to do, as a result we HAVE been brought near to God [Eph 2:10,13]

BE>DO>HAVE is the way of the Kingdom of God.

Think about it.

85 comparisonWhen you’re living DO>HAVE>BE anything that keeps you from doing what you need to do, or from obtaining what you need to have prevents you from being who you’re meant to be.

In this view, people are a threat. If your roommate has what you think you’re supposed to have, you’ll view her as a competitor. If a co-worker does what you think you need to do—or does it faster, better, quicker—you’ll naturally interpret this as a hazard to your becoming.

Rather than being blessed for someone’s success, you feel diminished—in some crazy way. So you’re jealous, bitter, resentful, or worse!

85 envyDo you live in comparison?

Notice your language. If you frequently evaluate yourself in reference to others (better, prettier, less than, better paid, faster, less successful, smarter, taller, less popular) you’re living DO>HAVE>BE.

A mentor, Lawrence Edwards once told me “comparison is the seedbed of envy”. Envy is deadly to relationships. [Mk 7:22]

In DO>HAVE>BE you can’t be generous, because anything you give away reduces what you have left. And that shrinks your significance.

But living BE>DO>HAVE your identity is solid, secure, intact. It’s not based on performance, other’s opinions, or what you have. You are. And, secure in who you are, you live generously with praise, talent, friendship, resources, opportunities, material goods, wisdom, esteem, perspective.

Pastor, is that church down the street a competitor or an opening for you to bring glory to God?

It all depends…on you.

 

 

 

Coaching Distinctions #85.doc