70 hearingMost people think that when we’re having a conversation you are listening to me… and I am listening to you. It’s the first delusion of audition.

By “audition” I mean hearing. 


Attending to what is being spoken.

There is a common fallacy that contributes greatly to communication frustration, unrealistic expectations, and much wasted effort.

This isn’t to say that when we’re having a conversation that you’re not listening to anything.  You are.

You’re just not listening to me.

And, without intentional discipline and effort, I’m not listening to you, either.



70 curtainLet’s pull back the curtain on the first audition delusion…

What you are listening to is that little voice inside your head.

Your running commentary.

What you’re saying about what I’m saying.

Test it out. Next time you’re in a conversation, attending a lecture, hearing a sermon, or listening to an audiobook, notice your thoughts.

See if you can discern the “running commentary” you’re having about what is being said.

Then, see if you can silence it, so you’re hearing just what’s being said by the person you thought you were listening to.

You can!


Coaching distinctions #70.doc