We’re examining one of the most helpful insights on human behavior I’ve learned. The “Universal Human Paradigm”, was explained this way:

1) Human beings are “resistance machines”.

2) When life looks the way we prefer, we engage it.

3) And, when life doesn‘t look the way we prefer, we resist it.

4) The universal way that human beings resist life is by withholding their participation from it.

66 architectIf you, like me, believe that God is sovereign, omnipotent, omniscient—as the Bible illustrates—then consider who is the ultimate architect of your life’s circumstances. This isn’t to suggest you don’t have a choice.

You always do.

Yet, much of what surrounds us is beyond our control, even our influence.

I choose to believe that these are the provision of a loving God who “in all things works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” [Rom 8:28].

In other words, the life I have is the one God intends for me.

So, when I’m in resistance, I’m withholding my participation from the life I am meant to live!  

I’m also clear that my life needs me. It needs me to be “all in”: participating as fully as I can.

Bringing Christ with me into every mess, predicament, conundrum, perplexity, and unsolvable riddle. 66 perplexity

Every single one.

The adolescent years for our six children were brutal for me. So much happened that I hadn’t anticipated, wasn’t prepared for, was shocked by, and felt was way out-of-bounds for the life I thought I was supposed to live.

For more than a decade, much of my life looked nothing like I preferred. Following the Universal Human Paradigm, I resisted…

And resisted…

And resisted…

I withheld my participation from my children, my family, my own life—immersing myself in seminary studies, 66 booksmy investment business, and pastoral ministry. I had more than enough to keep me busy. Busy and distracted from the barrage of calamities befalling our teens…many, at their own hands.

The more I persisted in resisting my life, the worse it got. Nothing resolved itself on its own.

One horrible night all this came to a head: a drug arrest and a fist fight with one of my own put me in the hospital.

It was then that I realized my life needed me

I didn’t know what to do. But, I knew I had to be in. All in.

So, in the language of my mentor and friend Ennio Salucci: “I threw myself into the middle of the room”

…and there I found Jesus and his provision for me and my children waiting.

 

 

Coaching distinctions #66.doc