Causing an Experience (part three)
Doze off in staff meeting. You might imagine that doesn’t affect everyone else in the room. You’d be wrong.
Last time, I told you I’m committed to cause my coaching clients to experience clarity, courage, and confidence to live the unique calling each has been given by God. Since each person is different, how I give myself varies from client to client.
One pastor is deeply invested in interpreting herself as her functions: what she accomplishes. Another is committed to an identity steeped in his shortcomings. A third is predisposed to have “peace” at any price— a consistent hindrance to being used by God to meaningfully change lives and advance the Kingdom of God. A fourth is so fearful of being overpowering that he fails to lead his people at all.
While each client is different, the ‘plumb line’ is the same: the minister living clearly, confidently, and courageously the life that God has given him.
And, you ask: “What life is that?”
It’s the life that is unfolding before him.
So, my opportunity is to create the experience of hope in God’s faithfulness, personal empowerment, and the willingness to engage life with one’s whole heart. To do this, I listen carefully to discern the beliefs to which my client clings in order to make sense of life while living only partially invested in it. These are “limiting beliefs” and all of us have them. Creating the experience of clarity, courage, and confidence often means challenging these beliefs in light of scripture and of life itself.
I get to support my client in examining the reliability of these often-unarticulated-but-powerful assumptions in light of who God is and how God has set life up. Sometimes, I am the interruption in the apprehension of these limiting beliefs. This calls me to create a very different experience: one of disruption, destabilization, and opposition.
And, because the client discovered it, that in itself creates the experience of empowerment.
I have this friend. Clare’s a therapist, really. And whenever I’ve gone to her she’s with me as if I’m fully capable of thriving in life—no matter how bleak things appear.
She’s with me as if God is right there to speak to my perplexities… and that I’m fully capable of discerning what God has to say.
And, somehow, God does and I do.
It’s exactly the experience she’s committed to cause.
Coaching distinctions #57.doc
This entry was posted by Kirk Kirlin on June 24, 2013 at 5:28 pm, and is filed under Client Relationships, coaching, Emotional Maturity, Leadership Skills, Leading, perspective. Follow any responses to this post through RSS 2.0.You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.